Supporting a loved one with a life-limiting illness starts with showing up, listening, and learning what kind of help they need.
But if you’re a carer, we understand that feeling of constant stress and uncertainty. Questions about medical care, treatment decisions, and end-of-life care can pile up quickly, especially when you’re still processing your own feelings.
If this sounds like your situation, please know these reactions are completely normal.
At PalAssist, we provide free palliative care support to Queensland families through registered nurses and allied health professionals. Our team is very familiar with the weight of caregiving responsibilities, and we’re here to help you through it.
In this guide, we’ll share practical palliative care guidance so you can take confident steps forward. You’ll also learn how to provide support while looking after your own wellbeing.
We’ll start with simple ways you can support your loved one.
Practical Ways Carers Can Support Their Loved Ones Daily
The most helpful thing you can do as a carer is focus on small, everyday actions that ease your loved one’s daily life. Often, just simple gestures like preparing meals, organising medications, or just being present can bring them genuine comfort. Here are some practical ways you can get started.
Understanding Their Condition and Care Needs
Your first step is to learn about your loved one’s illness, so you feel prepared for what’s ahead. Start by asking health professionals specific questions, like:
- What are the main symptoms, and which ones should I watch for day to day?
- How is the illness likely to progress over the coming months?
- Which medical treatment options are most suitable, and what are their side effects?
- How do I manage medications each day and monitor side effects?
You can take a notebook with you to jot down the main points during or after medical appointments. That way, you’ll have something to refer back to when things get busy or overwhelming.
Providing Daily Practical Support
Much of your time as a carer will involve a mix of physical tasks and simply being there. These are some areas where your help can make a meaningful impact:
- Personal Care: Your loved one may need help with bathing, dressing, or grooming as their energy fades. This kind of support allows them to maintain dignity and feel comfortable.
- Monitoring Symptoms: Pain levels, fatigue, and mood can change from day to day, so we recommend noting any changes you observe. These details will also give the healthcare team useful information when adjusting treatment plans.
- Organising Medication Management: Staying organised here will reduce the chance of missed medications or unwanted adverse effects. You can use pill boxes and phone reminders as simple tools to keep doses on schedule.
- Coordinating Medical Care and Transport: You can also take on the logistics of appointments, referrals, and trips to clinics or hospitals. If you can manage this, it’ll free your loved one to focus their energy on what they want to.
Remember, it’s always a good idea to talk about advance care planning sooner rather than later. These conversations will help you understand your loved one’s wishes for treatment, comfort, and end-of-life care.
Building a Support Network Around You
Caring for someone can feel isolating, so we always recommend reaching out to a mental health professional, support group, or local service to lighten the load.
You can also get valuable support from peers in similar situations, as they truly understand what you’re going through. And as time goes on, try to set realistic boundaries with your loved one and others involved in their care to protect your own mental health and wellbeing.
What No One Tells You About Decision-Making and Emotions
One of the hardest parts of caring for someone with a life-limiting illness is making decisions when emotions are running high. Guilt, fear, and exhaustion can cloud your thinking, but support is always available. Let’s look at what can help you feel more grounded during these moments.
Understanding Decision-Making Capacity
Start by understanding decision-making capacity. This simply means knowing when your loved one can participate in choices about their treatment and care.
So whenever they can, include them in conversations about what’s most important to them. Then, you can try to align your decisions with their values and wishes instead of what’s medically possible.
But you can also choose to skip treatments that are unlikely to improve quality of life, like aggressive surgeries or resuscitation attempts.
From a healthcare perspective, it will be considered a part of compassionate end-of-life planning. Yes, this is a valid choice, and it doesn’t mean you’re giving up.
Managing the Mental Health Challenges of Caregiving
Anticipatory grief, mood swings, and emotional exhaustion are all common experiences for family caregiving. You might feel guilt, worry, or a constant fear of doing the wrong thing, and these feelings often get stronger during end-of-life care.
We know how heavy this emotional load can become over time. If you’re struggling, don’t hesitate to reach out to a mental health professional, get emotional support and give yourself a safe space to process these feelings.
Using Palliative Care Guidance
Now, if all of this feels overwhelming, we recommend reaching out to a specialist palliative care team. They will be there the entire time to support your whole family, and explain your options for symptom relief, treatment choices, and comfort-focused care.
Apart from medical advice, they can also help your family members communicate openly, work through any disagreements, and plan ahead for whatever comes next.
Find the Right Palliative Guidance and Support for Carers
Did any of these tips resonate with you, or is there something else you’re finding difficult as a carer? We’d love to hear your thoughts.
We can tell you from experience that being a family caregiver is one of the most demanding experiences you can go through, both emotionally and physically. So don’t forget to give yourself credit and find small moments of rest.
It will be a lot to carry, but if you can find the right support services, peer networks, and health professionals early on, you can provide meaningful end-of-life care without burning out.
Your presence, love, and daily efforts mean a lot to your loved one, even on the days when it doesn’t feel like enough. So keep learning, keep asking questions, and reach out whenever you need a hand.
If you’re supporting loved ones through a life-limiting illness, Pal Assist is here for you. Give us a call on 1800 725 277 (7 am to 7 pm, daily) or start a chat online. Our nurses and allied health professionals offer free, confidential support to Queensland families.
Disclaimer
This blog provides general health and product information for educational purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose, treat, or replace advice from your healthcare professional. Always seek guidance from your GP, nurse, continence advisor, or pharmacist regarding your individual needs. If symptoms persist or you’re unsure about product use, consult a qualified healthcare provider.